I have so many emotions writing this post, but more than anything, I’m incredibly proud. If you’re reading this, you likely know Taylor’s complicated history of health issues. But today is a day of celebration.

We have a g-tube graduate!

Showing off – no more g-tube!

Today, after 19 months and 8 days, his doctor removed his g-tube. At 32 months old (exactly) he weighs 26.5 pounds. I can’t say that the journey was fun, nor can I say that his eating issues are cured, but the chapter of having a hole in his tummy to eat is over!

Honestly, I thought it would be years before this day came. I have to give Ryan 49% of the credit. If he hadn’t quit his job to stay at home with Taylor and work diligently with him on his eating, I’m convinced Taylor would still be getting calories from a tube. Ryan has counted every. single. calorie. He has figured out how to cram as many calories into as little volume as possible (thank you heavy whipping cream, butter, and olive oil). Ryan gradually pushed him to more solid textures and cleaned up A LOT of vomit. He still does, actually, because that shallow gag reflex continues to be a problem.

Look at that belly!

51% of the credit goes to Taylor. Stomaching 1,400-1,600 calories a day isn’t an easy task for such a tiny person. He fought hard (in more ways than one…fought to get through the food and fought us when we had to force him to eat). He is starting to like certain foods, all savory: cheese, meat, cheese, pizza, cottage cheese, French fries, and did I mention cheese? We still fight with him at many meals, but not all. I’m pretty sure if we didn’t insist that he eat, he would never tell us he was hungry. For all the work that still lies ahead, he got through the biggest hurdle.

I’m so proud of this little boy – and our whole family – for making some real life changes. It feels good to be rewarded with amazing progress and see Tay thrive.

Next week, Taylor starts daycare. We went for an informal orientation yesterday and multiple people asked me, “Are you sad about going back to work?” They were shocked when I told them I had been back for a while, that I only took 8 weeks of leave, and that Ryan was the one who had been caring for Taylor during his 18 weeks of paid leave.

Going back so early was hard but when I took this job last summer, I knew that an abbreviated leave was something I was going to have to do to rebuild the region. 

Since returning, my days have been crazy. I’ve been booked solid from 9-5 all over the Bay Area. I’ve figured out the art of pumping while I drive. There have been multiple evening events, too. With my days so packed, I haven’t had time during the day for email or actual work. That means that as soon as the kids are sleeping, I pull out my laptop and get to work. Some days I’m so tired by that point that I decide it is better to go to bed and wake up at 3 or 4am to get work done. 

I’ve fallen off the tightrope. Things have gotten out of control and what was once a balancing act is now a chaotic mess. A healthy work-life balance is something that is important to me and that I want to foster, but how do you achieve it when you have so much to do and not enough hours to do it?

Parents who read this: What advice do you have for managing heavy workloads with your family life? What time management tricks do you utilize during the day to make time for all the stuff you can’t do while you’re in meetings? And how do you not only make time for your kids but for your partner too?

I couldn’t sleep. Not a big surprise given that at 10:30am today I go in for a c-section and will come out with a baby.

It was strange when the doctor’s office called me a few weeks ago to schedule his delivery. Picking your child’s birthday is a very different experience than waiting anxiously wondering if today is going to be the day the little person you’ve been carrying for 40ish weeks decides to enter the world.

I’m sure everything will go smoothly with my delivery but it’s still scary. We also have so many unknowns ahead of us too – How long will he be in the NICU? When will they do his surgery? When can people even come see him in the hospital? When will I get to see him?

We are incredibly grateful for the number of prayers our family has received. Thanks so much for adding this baby (and his nervous parents) to prayer lists across the country. I know we are in good hands – both medically and spiritually. Those who know me well know I tend to be a pessimist (I prefer realist) but my overly optimistic husband has reminded me that right now, our boy needs all the optimism we can muster. 

In 4 hours, our boy will be here and we’ll start getting answers to the questions we’ve had for the last 20 weeks. More to come soon.